Despite the reports, published in 2020, under which the apex court directed the mental health fraternity to think beyond the individual and initiate social change, so that people with diverse sexualities and different gender expressions can thrive in a barrier-free environment there is a lack of sufficient mental health support by various authorities.“I feel like I have committed a sin. I was ashamed of myself.” Said Himanshu. This is a common feeling expressed by many queer individuals in relation to the factors affecting their mental health. Studies have consistently shown that LGBTQAI+ individuals face significantly higher rates of mental health issues compared to their heterosexual and cisgender counterpart. The higher rates of mental health issues can be attributed to several factors, including societal and familial rejection, harassment, and internalized homophobia, as highlighted in a study by Meyer. With minimal or no mental health support, nearly 39% of LGBTQ youth have seriously considered suicide in the past twelve months, highlighting the severity of the crisis.
The heteronormative binary structure of society views heterosexuality as default, assigning specific gender roles and expectations to men and women, with no recognition of other identities. In contrast, the queer community embodies a wide spectrum of gender and sexual identities that defy these rigid norms. Queer individuals often reject traditional gender roles and sexual orientations, embracing fluidity and the freedom to explore and express their identities outside the confines of societal expectations.
"I had anxiety and suicidal thoughts throughout the day. I did not have the same confidence that I had earlier. This is a daily struggle in life. I know computers well, but when I went there for an interview, I forgot everything in my computer test. I was asked to press back but I was not able to recall the key" said Himanshu Mehta. Himanshu Identifies as a gay man. They live in Mumbai. They have done their master’s and as cooking is their passion they run a tiffin service. They say that the constant rejection, comparison with siblings, doubtful gaze of relatives and stigma attached with homosexuality impacted their personal and professional life. Their dreams to become a lawyer took a hit when anxiety and suicidal ideation forced them to undergo therapy. The treatment not only imposed a financial burden but also intensified feelings of worthlessness.
Like Himanshu, the conditioning and mental grooming of every child starts within the family, but this environment can become deeply distressing when family members impose strict norms and discriminate against the child and compare them with their siblings over things like work, mixing up easily with people and having confidence. Constant vigilant from parents and relatives on how to sit, speak, and walk creates a persistent background of scrutiny and exacerbates feelings of being different. "My family thinks that my identity and gender expressions are illness and the only way to cure this queerness is to get married and have children" says Vinay a resident of MP completing his undergraduate degree. Societal expectations to conform and fulfill traditional roles, such as being the family's breadwinner, being a first generational have further intensified the stress. Publicly, queer individuals may be hidden or not introduced by their parents due to the stigma attached to their identities, compounding feelings of social rejection.
“My depression is often negligible until it becomes severe, but the real reason - my sexuality - is often swept under the rug. People only see part of the picture, Anxiety kills you every day" says Himanshu.
Participants from their experience expressed that casteism, culture, geography and social hierarchy play significant roles in exacerbating mental health issues for queer individuals. Living in interior tribal area with limited or no access to luxurious things "While my stress and anxiety was completely visible to my family I was told sorrow and happiness are part of the same coin, one goes the other comes. That’s how my emotions were suppressed". said Vinay.The stigma and rejection also infiltrate the educational space for queer individuals. “Aaj bullying nahi hua, kya baat hai sab thik hai (No bullying today, what happened is everything okay?) says Riyansh a gay while sharing their experience of school days. They are a gender personal in development.
The trauma from such experiences are very triggering. Whereas Vinay says that "constant mock like cycle jaa rahi hai,(cycle is going)" and bullying in restroom, gaze of both girls and boys, impacted mentally to a point they started losing interest in studies which led to absenteeism and eventually a gap in studies. They say that molestation and bullying, particularly in bathrooms, forces people to avoid using facilities frequently. Not just this but students also avoid sitting next to queer individuals, reinforcing feelings of isolation, anxiety, depression and feelings of worthlessness.Kamlesh a queer individual and Hindi teacher by profession from Mumbai says “Coming from vernacular background I was already very nervous due to having a language barrier in college, but identity crisis added to further anxiety, trauma and depression". Though there are people around, but you always find yourself left out because of having feminine traits”.
Similar experience is observed in workplaces as well where the queer individual tends to hide their identity in order to avoid changed or discriminated behavior by their colleagues. Riyansh says “that the reason behind such act is, lack of operational and administrative policies in organizations which talks about bringing inclusivity but at the same time they are lucky to work in a place where there is a strong policy against discriminatory practices”.
The constant bullying, harassment and lack of support from friends, family and society leads to seeking therapy and medication which adds to unavoidable financial strain and further leads to anxiety and stress. Despite the reports, published in 2020, under which the apex court directed the mental health fraternity to think beyond the individual and initiate social change, so that people with diverse sexualities and different gender expressions can thrive in a barrier-free environment there is a lack of sufficient mental health support by various authorities. But there are organizations like Mariawala Health Initiative, Humsafar Trust, Sangath NGO which are taking action in creating awareness and providing mental health support to queer people.
Besides this, identity crisis had a huge impact on their decision of choosing a suitable career for them, says Vinay who had frequent gaps in pursuing their further studies. “With safe space being a priority of mine I had to take extra caution while seeking admission in known university because I didn’t want to lose my mental peace anymore which didn’t align with the career they wanted to pursue”.
The death by suicide in May 2020 of Anjana Hareesh, bisexual student from Kerala who underwent forced conversion therapy at the hands of mental health professionals in connivance with her family, provides a window to the world of our mental health systems.
In a world that often marginalizes those with different identities, queer individuals frequently turn to dating apps and social media in search of love and connection. While they offer opportunities for meeting new people, they also expose users to harassment, rejection, and other negative experiences because of superficial evaluation like physical appearance, income, and social status forcing individuals to question their worth.
The double-edged nature of social media and dating apps is evident for many, including Sujoy a gay man and currently working as a teacher in Navi Mumbai. They are also undergoing constant theories and medication says “While I was using a dating app I came across a verbal sexual abuse “I felt like crying. It was like somebody was forcibly raping me” On one hand, these platforms can provide a sense of community and potential romantic connections; on the other hand, they often bring about harassment and anxiety. feelings of inadequacy.
Dating apps also raise concerns about sexual health risks and personal safety. The anonymity of these platforms can lead to dangerous situations, such as abusive relationships, which can severely impact mental health and may necessitate therapy or treatment. Cases of robbery, threats, and physical violence, murders are not uncommon, adding another layer of stress and danger for users. Harish says that "my friend through a dating app was called by a boy to meet but it turned out to be horrible experience as he was threatened, and their ATM card and mobile were forcefully snatched”.
Individuals reported that queer individuals and their cishet counterparts have their own mental health stress and it is not comparable as cishet person in binary structure have to meet the patriarchal societal expectations and suppress their emotions but the severity of queer individuals seems more as they are abandoned by family, society, educational space, workspace, human rights and everyone but whereas cis people and their rights are preserved in all these intuitions. The absence of rights and provision make them powerless and marginalized in the society which sleeps them into severe depression, anxiety and having suicidal thoughts.
Participants recommended increasing mental health awareness and dialogue, along with updating education curricula to be more inclusive and practical. They emphasized that human rights should be clearly recognized for everyone, particularly in light of the constant harassment queer individuals face. To address this, mental health support such as queer affirmative counselling, therapies and medication should be accessible, ideally at little to no cost.