The recent brutal murder of a 31-year-old doctor has brought the issue of workplace safety for women into sharp focus, raising serious questions about existing policies and the culture that prevails in many professional environments. As a working professional, I feel compelled to speak out about my own experience with workplace gender violence. Silence, I believe, could make me complicit in perpetuating a misogynistic culture that thrives in many workplaces.
In January 2024, while serving my notice period, I was asked to visit a different office location. Despite my request for a safe and comfortable journey, I was denied. The office made me wait overnight at the airport, far from my hometown, because my flight was scheduled for early morning. Traveling at midnight was not an option, but instead of booking a more convenient flight later in the day, my request for basic accommodation was refused. My manager’s response was unsettling: “We don’t have any policies to provide accommodation for those on notice period, but I can ask some of my friends if they would let you stay at their place.” I had no idea who these "friends" were or how safe it would be to stay with them, and this wasn't the first time such a suggestion had been made. Female employees were often encouraged to stay at someone’s (Mostly other office staff) house when visiting other work locations, a practice that I always found threatening.
When the day of my trip to Lucknow arrived, I hadn’t been provided with any details about where I would be staying for the next two weeks. I repeatedly tried to contact my manager for information, but she didn’t respond to my calls or messages. It wasn’t until midnight, during my journey, that I received a WhatsApp message from her with the address of the office guest house where I’d be staying. She informed me that another employee would be there to open the door and receive me when I arrived in the morning. Initially, I felt a sense of relief, but that quickly changed when the situation took a disturbing turn.
The employee who was supposed to meet me at the guest house started messaging me on WhatsApp. At first, he provided basic information about how to reach the guest house and the amenities available, but gradually, the conversation shifted to inappropriate and suggestive messages. I was unsure how to respond, especially since I wasn’t receiving any support from my manager or other senior staff, and this individual was my only contact in Lucknow. Although I felt like turning back and heading home, I decided to continue with the trip, hoping his behavior would change once I arrived.
I reached Lucknow early the next morning and took a cab to the guest house. The employee welcomed me politely and showed me around the guest house, behaving decently at that time. I tried to dismiss what had happened the previous night, thinking I might have overreacted. He even pointed out some local places to eat before leaving. The rest of the day passed without any messages from him, and I began to think that perhaps I had misjudged the situation.
However, that night around 10:30 p.m., while I was on a call with a friend, the same employee called me again. This time, he was clearly intoxicated, as I could hear people around him saying things like, “Bhaiya, you’ve had too much to drink. Where’s your home? We’ll take you there.” Despite being in such a state, he asked me to meet him for a late-night party. I refused and hung up, but he called again, repeating his request. This time, I was more forceful in my refusal and ended the call. Despite ending the call, I was terrified because this person had another key to the guest house and the lock on the door of my room wasn’t working properly.
I immediately contacted some friends and told them everything that had happened. They provided moral support and encouraged me to take action. Summoning the courage, I called my manager late that night and explained the entire situation to her, sharing screenshots of the messages as well. Although I was unsure whether to file a formal complaint under the Sexual Harassment Act at the workplace, I asked my manager to ensure my safety and security in the guest house.
Two days passed without any response or follow-up from my manager. The arrival of a few other team members at the office guest house provided some comfort, as I was no longer alone. I continued to work from the office with them, but the incident left me traumatized, and my manager’s indifference only added to my distress.
Several days later, my manager called me for a different matter, and only then did she ask, as a mere formality, if everything was fine with me. A week later, she visited Lucknow with the CEO, and although they stayed at the same guest house, she completely ignored me, acting as if I didn’t exist. Despite spending the entire day at the office, she never spoke to me. Finally, I approached her and asked for some time to discuss my concerns. She casually said, “Tumko bula lenge” (We’ll call you).
By 8 p.m., she still hadn’t reached out, so I went to her room and knocked on the door. She finally gave me half an hour of her time. After discussing project updates, I brought up the incident again and expressed my concerns. I reiterated that while I wasn’t certain of the employee’s intentions, his behavior made me feel unsafe, and such actions should not be tolerated in a workplace. I also shared my dilemma about whether to file a complaint with the office’s POSH (Prevention of Sexual Harassment) cell.
My manager’s response was disheartening. She acknowledged that the employee’s intentions were likely inappropriate but insisted that it was my responsibility as a woman to behave in a way that prevents men from crossing boundaries. She implied that such behavior is common and that women must learn to manage these situations through their expressions and body language. She also warned me that escalating the matter to higher authorities might upset the CEO, who could find ways to blame me for the incident. It felt like a subtle threat, suggesting that reporting the incident would be futile and could even harm me.
My manager took measures to ensure my safety by restricting access to the guest house during my stay, but she discouraged me from filing a complaint, saying it would be a waste of time. She argued that taking action against the employee didn’t make sense financially or logically for the organization, especially since he was an exceptional worker, and I was about to leave the company. Her words left me shattered. I resigned from the organization, and it has been six months since, during which I’ve been jobless, desperately searching for a new role but with little faith in the development sector.
I’ve considered exposing these people and writing about my terrible experience many times, but I understand how the system works. Doing so would likely harm me more than them. Without a reference from my last organization, finding a good job would be difficult. The hiring process and the system often protect those in power. I also fear that being too outspoken might deter other employers from hiring me, as they may wish to maintain the status quo in a misogynistic work culture.
Workplaces in India remain unsafe for women, and this reality has become normalized in our society. Despite all the policies in place, there is no justice, and hope seems elusive.