Going out of the house on a Sunday has always been difficult for me. Everyone asks, "Where are you going?" But today, I was happy because after a whole week, I was going to meet Kundan. I woke up at 9 AM and immediately started getting ready. I had already told Mom the night before that I wouldn’t be home tomorrow. I had breakfast, packed lunch for the afternoon, and left the house.
Mom knows about Kundan, so she doesn’t ask too many questions. However, I’ve never told her that I love him. I’ve just said that we are good friends. But I know she understands that it’s more than just friendship.
The hardest part is answering my siblings. Since morning, I was bombarded with questions—"Didi, where are you going?" "Can I come too?" "If you don’t tell me, I won’t tell either!" Finally, I told a small lie and left the house.
As soon as I stepped out, I called Kundan and started telling him about the difficulties I faced leaving home. We both came out from our respective lanes and met at an intersection where we could easily find an auto-rickshaw. As we sat in the rickshaw, we both stayed silent. But as soon as the rickshaw started moving, we began talking.
Our entire day was planned in advance. We just wanted to spend time together. As soon as we got off the rickshaw, I got a call from Dad. I signaled Kundan to stay quiet and took the call. Dad was asking me to pay the electricity bill for the house in the village. Once the call ended, we bought some snacks and continued our journey.
Under the shade of a large tree, I laid out a scarf and set up the food. We started talking. There was laughter and some old grievances too, things that needed to be cleared. It felt like the day would never end.
Then my sister called. "Where are you right now?" Her voice sounded anxious. "I’m just outside… What happened?" "Come home... right now!" "But what happened?" What she said next made my body go cold. It felt like time had suddenly stopped.
A four-year-old history... How did it reach my home?
#LoveAndDesire
January 2025, four years ago today,
I worked at a stationery shop. The shop owner treated me like his sister. During festivals, the workers would leave for their villages and sometimes never come back.
One day, a boy named Satish took leave and didn’t return. Instead, Roshan came. He was always sad and quiet. Within a few days, he won everyone’s sympathy. He told me that his family mistreated him, made him do all the work, and didn’t even feed him properly. His mother wasn’t alive; he had a stepmother. Slowly, I began to feel sympathy for him, and maybe even love.
At that time, we had keypad phones, and we mostly communicated through text messages. The first time he received his salary, he asked me, "Let’s go somewhere and hang out!" But it was impossible for us to get a day off together.
One day, I got a call from his number, but the voice was someone else’s. "I’m Roshan’s wife," she said. My heart seemed to stop. She told me that Roshan had secretly married her, and the woman he had been calling his stepmother was actually his real mother. Everything was a lie!
I stopped talking to Roshan immediately. But after that, strange things started happening. Calls started coming to both my phone and my mom’s from new numbers. This girl would curse me, saying I was still talking to Roshan. When calls started coming to Mom’s phone, I had to tell her everything, something I never wanted her to know. After that, I changed my SIM card, but I couldn’t change Mom’s because that number was used for all important work.
Sometimes the calls were fewer, sometimes more. One day, Roshan called on Mom’s phone. "That girl isn’t my wife, she ran away with another man after marrying me," he said. I was confused—what was true and what was a lie?
Then, I received a message from that girl on Instagram, with obscene photos of her with Roshan! That evening, Roshan called again, and I yelled at him, threatening to report him to the police before hanging up. But the story didn’t end there. A few days later, I found out that the girl was involved in prostitution with other women. And after learning that, I thanked God for keeping me safe.
Today, four years later
Roshan’s wife came to my room with two other girls in my absence, creating a scene and humiliating my family. This happened because the day before, Roshan called Mom again, cursing her. In response, my younger sister threatened to have him beaten by the police, which is why his wife came to our house seeking revenge, thinking I had threatened her husband.
The people from our neighborhood were listening closely. She accused me of having an affair with another boy who worked at the shop! My siblings were also there. Mom was fighting for me. My sister told me all this, and I felt a surge of anger. All I could think was that if I had been home, I would have taught that girl a lesson.
I had already told Kundan everything about my past. But after all this, any boy could doubt any girl. Still, Kundan didn’t ask me any questions. I just cried, looking at him.
Mom and Dad sat silently. My siblings said, "Didi, I sent that girl away. She was saying all kinds of nasty things about you." Mom explained to Dad that if that girl came to our room again, they would file a police complaint.
No one else asked me anything. Maybe I wasn’t successful in erasing my past, but in these four years, I had earned everyone’s trust again.
#LoveAndDesire